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OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46467] Thu, 11 September 2003 04:55 Go to next message
DragonFg is currently offline  DragonFg
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I've been doing out with this girl for 9 months now and I don't know something has changed about her. She just won't be close to me anymore. When she's upset she shuts me out, and I try to get to talk and it makes her more mad.

She even said at her b-day party this saturday that she was gonna dance with anybody she wanted to. And I mean dirty dance. And she knows that would hurt me a lot so why would she say that, much less do it. I don't know if she actually will or not but if she does them we're thro cus I'm not gonna stand for her rubbing herself all over another guy. And if the guy doesn't keep it clean I'll probably kick his ass anyways for disrepecting me.

Ahh this is just so hard! It's the hardest thing I've ever had to deal with because I have very stong feelings for her.


"Behind every great man is a woman, and behind her is his wife."

[Updated on: Thu, 11 September 2003 08:22]

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OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46468] Thu, 11 September 2003 04:58 Go to previous messageGo to next message
DragonFg is currently offline  DragonFg
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it wont let me edit my post I the part about "if she does them we're thro".....thats suppose to be "if she does then we're thro"[/i]

"Behind every great man is a woman, and behind her is his wife."
Re: OT: Relationships, ahh!!! [message #46494] Thu, 11 September 2003 08:06 Go to previous messageGo to next message
John Shaft Jr. is currently offline  John Shaft Jr.
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DragonFg

I've been doing out with this girl for 9 months now and I don't know something has changed about her. She just won't be close to me anymore. When she's upset she shuts me out, and I try to get to talk and it makes her more mad.

She even said at her b-day party this saturday that she was gonna dance with anybody she wanted to. And I mean dirty dance. And she knows that would hurt me a lot so why would she say that, much less do it. I don't know if she actually will or not but if she does them we're thro cus I'm not gonna stand for her rubbing herself all over another guy. And if the guy doesn't keep it clean I'll probably kick his ass anyways for disrepecting me.

Ahh this is just so hard! It's the hardest thing I've ever had to deal with because I have very stong feelings for her.


Well only thing I can say is if you have strong feelings for her then just get her alone in a room and tell her how you feel about her.

But see thats just my advice and on what I would do. Maybe someone esle on here has some better suggestions.
OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46498] Thu, 11 September 2003 08:17 Go to previous messageGo to next message
DragonFg is currently offline  DragonFg
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I might try that. Right now all i'm concerned about is the dancing thing. If she didn't mean it then everything will be better. It's just she looks at things differently form me to. I see everything in black and white because it is. But a lot of things she only sees gray. I think it would help her to start going to church again too, cus I know she believes the same as me but I dont think she thinks its important. She thinks like most people today do...thinks its all opinions so it doesn't really matter what you think. Well the thing is everybody is entitled to their own opinion for sure, but that doesn't change the fact that there is a right and wrong way to believe.

I know i'm rambling on but so much is going tho my mind and I just want to sort thro it all.


"Behind every great man is a woman, and behind her is his wife."
OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46501] Thu, 11 September 2003 08:25 Go to previous messageGo to next message
John Shaft Jr. is currently offline  John Shaft Jr.
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I don't mind you rambling on. I'll just sit here and listen and try to help. Kinda like what a psychiatrist does. Smile
OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46503] Thu, 11 September 2003 08:29 Go to previous messageGo to next message
DragonFg is currently offline  DragonFg
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John Shaft Jr.

I don't mind you rambling on. I'll just sit here and listen and try to help. Kinda like what a psychiatrist does. Smile


Yea thanx, I try to do the same for everybody. It's just when she is upset she won't talk to me so I just end up sitting there doing nothing, wanting so bad to have something to make her feel better and she shuts me out. Thats hard for me!


"Behind every great man is a woman, and behind her is his wife."
OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46506] Thu, 11 September 2003 08:34 Go to previous messageGo to next message
DragonFg is currently offline  DragonFg
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And I've treid standing up to her and that makes it all much worse. Now I think I'm going to try just saying sorry and not giving any excuses for myself. Not like beg at her feet or anything like that just try a different way to make it better. I'm running out of patience tho. I mean I care about her and I think the world of her but I'm not so in love that i'll deal with an attitude towards me when all I want to do is help.

"Behind every great man is a woman, and behind her is his wife."
OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46510] Thu, 11 September 2003 08:38 Go to previous messageGo to next message
John Shaft Jr. is currently offline  John Shaft Jr.
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DragonFg


Yea thanx, I try to do the same for everybody. It's just when she is upset she won't talk to me so I just end up sitting there doing nothing, wanting so bad to have something to make her feel better and she shuts me out. Thats hard for me!


Did you ever like let her cool off for awhile then try to talk to her?
OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46512] Thu, 11 September 2003 08:40 Go to previous messageGo to next message
John Shaft Jr. is currently offline  John Shaft Jr.
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DragonFg

And I've treid standing up to her and that makes it all much worse. Now I think I'm going to try just saying sorry and not giving any excuses for myself. Not like beg at her feet or anything like that just try a different way to make it better. I'm running out of patience tho. I mean I care about her and I think the world of her but I'm not so in love that i'll deal with an attitude towards me when all I want to do is help.


Well my only best advice is to tell her how you feel. And tell her what she does to you when you try to help her out. And how you feel about about it when she does it.
OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46518] Thu, 11 September 2003 08:47 Go to previous messageGo to next message
DragonFg is currently offline  DragonFg
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She's had 3 days to cool down now so I'm hoping she'll talk to me again

And she doesnt respond when she's mad its like she wants to stay mad and wont let it go. Ahh she's just like my dad, takes too much pride in herself! I mean sometimes when I'm angry I want to be left alone too. But if she were to come to me when I was angry and wanted to talk because she was concerned about me that would just by itself make me feel better.


"Behind every great man is a woman, and behind her is his wife."
OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46521] Thu, 11 September 2003 08:54 Go to previous messageGo to next message
John Shaft Jr. is currently offline  John Shaft Jr.
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DragonFg

She's had 3 days to cool down now so I'm hoping she'll talk to me again

And she doesnt respond when she's mad its like she wants to stay mad and wont let it go. Ahh she's just like my dad, takes too much pride in herself! I mean sometimes when I'm angry I want to be left alone too. But if she were to come to me when I was angry and wanted to talk because she was concerned about me that would just by itself make me feel better.


Try talking to her today. And if youhave a chance to talk to her, tell her how you feel about her.

But if she still is mad and does not want to talk then ummmmmmmmm...... try calling and tell her you need to talk to her about some things and need to straighten out some stuff with her.
OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46522] Thu, 11 September 2003 08:59 Go to previous messageGo to next message
DragonFg is currently offline  DragonFg
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well i sent an email just apaolgising for eveything i knew i had done and even anything i didnt realize i had done i said i was sorry for that too.

Well she's got all honors classes at a private school and soccer practice pretty much everyday and she's got me to deal with too i guess. Plus she's been sick the past few days too. I want to be her medicine for all of it. She's just not being the same person I spent half my summer with.

Well anyway thanks for ya help


"Behind every great man is a woman, and behind her is his wife."
OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46527] Thu, 11 September 2003 09:05 Go to previous messageGo to next message
KIRBY098 is currently offline  KIRBY098
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I recommend a far different approach.

It's too late to save this relationship. For whatever reason, she has ALREADY decided you are out of the picture.

I recommend saving your dignity, and back out. You are proving to be needy, whiny, groveling, and unlike a man. You DO NOT NEED others to feel self worth. Just go on about life WITHOUT the uncommunicative, hateful, and self serving wench.


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OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46528] Thu, 11 September 2003 09:08 Go to previous messageGo to next message
DragonFg is currently offline  DragonFg
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KIRBY098

I recommend a far different approach.

It's too late to save this relationship. For whatever reason, she has ALREADY decided you are out of the picture.

I recommend saving your dignity, and back out. You are proving to be needy, whiny, groveling, and unlike a man. You DO NOT NEED others to feel self worth. Just go on about life WITHOUT the uncommunicative, hateful, and self serving wench.


I hope you're wrong, not to say that you are...but I hope you are


"Behind every great man is a woman, and behind her is his wife."
OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46530] Thu, 11 September 2003 09:09 Go to previous messageGo to next message
John Shaft Jr. is currently offline  John Shaft Jr.
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Your welcome. Anytime. Always glad to help.

Now time for payment. I charge $250 a hour. Since I started post at 10:06 a.m. (Central Time) it is now 11:06. Now how would you pay, cash or credit. Smile

I'm just playing around. I always glad to help out someone with problems in life. Very Happy

[Updated on: Thu, 11 September 2003 09:15]

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OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46532] Thu, 11 September 2003 09:10 Go to previous messageGo to next message
DragonFg is currently offline  DragonFg
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I'd rather sacrafice my digity and my pride to do the right thing. Don't care about that kinda stuff. I have the worst guilty concience of anybody alive I think. If I've wronged somebody it hurts me too thats just who i am

"Behind every great man is a woman, and behind her is his wife."

[Updated on: Thu, 11 September 2003 09:12]

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OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46533] Thu, 11 September 2003 09:11 Go to previous messageGo to next message
DragonFg is currently offline  DragonFg
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John Shaft Jr.

Your welcome. Anytime. Always glad to help.

Now time for payment. I charge $250 a hour. Since I started post at 10:06 a.m. (Central Time) it is now 11:06. Now how would you pay, cash or credit. Smile

I'm just playing around. I always glad to help out someone with problem in life. Very Happy


lol


"Behind every great man is a woman, and behind her is his wife."
OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46536] Thu, 11 September 2003 09:14 Go to previous messageGo to next message
John Shaft Jr. is currently offline  John Shaft Jr.
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KIRBY098

I recommend a far different approach.

It's too late to save this relationship. For whatever reason, she has ALREADY decided you are out of the picture.

I recommend saving your dignity, and back out. You are proving to be needy, whiny, groveling, and unlike a man. You DO NOT NEED others to feel self worth. Just go on about life WITHOUT the uncommunicative, hateful, and self serving wench.


Thats some good advice right there. But rememeber its up to you and what you want to do. We're just here to help you out.
OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46538] Thu, 11 September 2003 09:15 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Crimson is currently offline  Crimson
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DragonFg

I'd rather sacrafice my digity and my pride to do the right thing. Don't care about that kinda stuff. I have the worst guilty concience of anybody alive I think. If I've wronged somebody it hurts me too thats just who i am


I agree with Kirby, actually... if she's pulling back, you can try and ask her why she's pulling back and see if it's something you are willing to do/change, if not, back out. You'll find someone else.


I'm the bawss.
OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46542] Thu, 11 September 2003 09:24 Go to previous messageGo to next message
DragonFg is currently offline  DragonFg
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Crimson

DragonFg

I'd rather sacrafice my digity and my pride to do the right thing. Don't care about that kinda stuff. I have the worst guilty concience of anybody alive I think. If I've wronged somebody it hurts me too thats just who i am


I agree with Kirby, actually... if she's pulling back, you can try and ask her why she's pulling back and see if it's something you are willing to do/change, if not, back out. You'll find someone else.

Yeah you're exactly right


"Behind every great man is a woman, and behind her is his wife."
OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46548] Thu, 11 September 2003 09:55 Go to previous messageGo to next message
kawolsky is currently offline  kawolsky
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Crimson

DragonFg

I'd rather sacrafice my digity and my pride to do the right thing. Don't care about that kinda stuff. I have the worst guilty concience of anybody alive I think. If I've wronged somebody it hurts me too thats just who i am


I agree with Kirby, actually... if she's pulling back, you can try and ask her why she's pulling back and see if it's something you are willing to do/change, if not, back out. You'll find someone else.


crimson is the person most likely to know what to do here....
for obvious reasons


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OT: Relationships, ahh!!! (help!) [message #46614] Thu, 11 September 2003 14:20 Go to previous message
Dante
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DragonFg

And she doesnt respond when she's mad its like she wants to stay mad and wont let it go.


shit, i need a woman like that... (btw, she is just dealing with it differently then you, not badly, but some people require extreme methods to get over stuff, personally, i like to be alone till i can't think about it anymore, then i can come back to the person i am with and be happy, not sit there looming about a past problem)

believe me, women are frustrating whether they want to constantly talk about there problems, or constantly want to get away from you when angry, simply do this, if she is doing what she is doing, it has been over for a while, otherwise... well dude, i would end it, nothing in this relationship sounds healthy...


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