Home » General Discussions » General Discussion » Some IRL Drama just went down; your thoughts?
| Some IRL Drama just went down; your thoughts? [message #433779] |
Fri, 30 July 2010 00:24  |
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snpr1101
Messages: 425
Registered: June 2007
Location: Australia
Karma: 0
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Commander |
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So I came home from work today to find a car parked outside my house. My friend looks at me and says "Want me to wait outside"? I say yea and I walk inside and find some 20ish year old looking dude lying on my sisters bed inside. My sister is 16 years old. 16 for fuck sake. Nobody is home; nobody except my sister knows this dude let alone knows he's even there.
I walk past the room and into the bathroom thinking about what I should do next. My sister says "Oh have you met [name]"?
I say "Uh, No I haven't". He didn't even look me in the eye or get up to shake my hand. My sister then just closed the door. So I instantly walked outside, got my mate to come inside with me and kick this fucker out of my house.
My mate knocks on the door, opens it and my sister just put a shirt on as we opened it. He says "You, out, now. Get the fuck out. Move etc" The guy kept standing there in shock/guilt. We pushed the guy out of the house and told him to fuck off.
My sister claimed they are best friends and they didn't do anything. She was just getting "changed" and he was fucking staring at her while doing so. They were just "watching a movie" when there is a big flat screen TV in the lounge that is 3 times the size of hers and definition. I said I didn't give a fuck. You can't have some 20 year old dude lying on your bed in your room with no one home and no one knowing who the fuck he is. I explained that she still lives under parents control and I bet either one of them would not let this guy be there.
She argued with me and my mate for 30 minutes about it. She cried throughout the whole thing and cried some more when I went for a shower after it.
So, do you think it was wrong of us to kick this guy out? My sister argues about the way in which we did it; she can't argue with the reasons WHY. Apparently she hates me and my friend and no doubt everyone of her friends and mine will learn of this.
I'm 18 and would feel uncomfortable hanging out in a 16 year old (minor = hello legal case) girls room. It just isn't right - especially when nobody is home. How can I be expected to believe that they were doing nothing. That's bullshit.
So, what are your thoughts of a day in the life of snpr1101?
What would you do if you were in this situation?
[Updated on: Fri, 30 July 2010 00:25] Report message to a moderator |
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| Re: Some IRL Drama just went down; your thoughts? [message #433782 is a reply to message #433779] |
Fri, 30 July 2010 00:53  |
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Dover
Messages: 2547
Registered: March 2006
Location: Monterey, California
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lol.
You reacted badly. All you did was alienate your sister. If she wants to fuck 20 year olds, kicking them out of her room won't stop her. What did you accomplish, exactly?
| DarkDemin wrote on Thu, 03 August 2006 19:19 |
Remember kids the internet is serious business.
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| Re: Some IRL Drama just went down; your thoughts? [message #433783 is a reply to message #433779] |
Fri, 30 July 2010 00:57 |
a000clown
Messages: 363
Registered: May 2005
Location: Canada
Karma: 0
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Commander |
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Well my sister is older than me, so I've never felt responsible for her and thus can't directly relate.
That said, if I did have a younger sister I would image I'd want to protect and look out for her.
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Ok I was writing this whole long paragraph but the more thought I put into it the more I thought about how wrong 16 vs 20 ages are to me. imo, that's just disgusting.
She may be pissed at you and you'll probably take some flak for it, but at least you won't feel guilty about if something bad were to happen and knowing you could have easily prevented it.
You're looking out for your lil sis, that's all that matters.
Some people may say mind your own business, but I'd rather take care of those important to me.
...
Edit: I agree though that maybe kicking him out wasn't the best option. You could have called for your sister with some random excuse and talk it over in private.
[Updated on: Fri, 30 July 2010 01:00] Report message to a moderator |
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| Re: Some IRL Drama just went down; your thoughts? [message #433792 is a reply to message #433779] |
Fri, 30 July 2010 01:33 |
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snpr1101
Messages: 425
Registered: June 2007
Location: Australia
Karma: 0
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Commander |
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Yea, maybe I did react badly. I don't really see how the comparison between shouting at imaginary people on my lawn is quite comparable to finding a 20 year old guy in my sisters room under such circumstances.
I'll be honest with you; I don't understand how I alienated my sister whilst doing this. My sister and I aren't exactly close; yet I still care for her. Yes, If she wants to fuck 20 year olds, she will find a way, but it sure as hell won't be happening here.
What did I accomplish? Probably not much. But I would think that if the guy isn't a complete douche; he might get the message that this just isn't happening. If I find out that this happens again; I can honestly say I will find him and beat the shit out of him. I know words are only words, and I'm not trying to to be over confident or the "tough guy on the internet"; yet I mean it.
I can almost read the response already- "So, you're going to beat up everyone she has sex with?" Yes, I know this isn't the solution to the problem, but if he is willing to have sex with a minor despite what has happened; then he deserves it in my book.
Yes, I could of called her out and spoke with her. But I would of been given the same bullshit story that can't justify him being there anyway. She would of gone back to her room and told him exactly what I just said. I'd rather be direct and have him know what I think firsthand as opposed to my sister telling him.
There is obviously more to the story and more depth to the relationships; details that I probably won't discuss. And I know this is a huge deal to everyone else ( ), yet again I ask - What would you of done?
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| Re: Some IRL Drama just went down; your thoughts? [message #433794 is a reply to message #433792] |
Fri, 30 July 2010 01:41 |
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Dover
Messages: 2547
Registered: March 2006
Location: Monterey, California
Karma: 0
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General (2 Stars) |
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| snpr1101 wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 01:33 |
Yea, maybe I did react badly. I don't really see how the comparison between shouting at imaginary people on my lawn is quite comparable to finding a 20 year old guy in my sisters room under such circumstances.
I'll be honest with you; I don't understand how I alienated my sister whilst doing this. My sister and I aren't exactly close; yet I still care for her. Yes, If she wants to fuck 20 year olds, she will find a way, but it sure as hell won't be happening here.
What did I accomplish? Probably not much. But I would think that if the guy isn't a complete douche; he might get the message that this just isn't happening. If I find out that this happens again; I can honestly say I will find him and beat the shit out of him. I know words are only words, and I'm not trying to to be over confident or the "tough guy on the internet"; yet I mean it.
I can almost read the response already- "So, you're going to beat up everyone she has sex with?" Yes, I know this isn't the solution to the problem, but if he is willing to have sex with a minor despite what has happened; then he deserves it in my book.
Yes, I could of called her out and spoke with her. But I would of been given the same bullshit story that can't justify him being there anyway. She would of gone back to her room and told him exactly what I just said. I'd rather be direct and have him know what I think firsthand as opposed to my sister telling him.
There is obviously more to the story and more depth to the relationships; details that I probably won't discuss. And I know this is a huge deal to everyone else (),
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lol
| snpr1101 wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 01:33 |
yet again I ask - What would you of done?
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I'm 20. My sister just turned 15. I trust that she's smart enough to bring the right guys home. If, by chance, she isn't, then me playing sex-police isn't going to do anybody any good. And neither will playing tough guy.
Your issue isn't with the guy. You don't know him, he doesn't know you, and neither one of you gives a fuck about the other. Your issue is with your sister.
| DarkDemin wrote on Thu, 03 August 2006 19:19 |
Remember kids the internet is serious business.
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| Re: Some IRL Drama just went down; your thoughts? [message #433797 is a reply to message #433792] |
Fri, 30 July 2010 01:55 |
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reborn
Messages: 3231
Registered: September 2004
Location: uk - london
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| snpr1101 wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 04:44 |
| reborn wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 03:40 |
The whole attitude of "but it sure as hell wont happen here", is what's alienating her.
It's ok, as long as I don't see it! Said the blind man.
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Not quite. What I mean by that is that while I'm here; theres no way I would let that happen. While she isn't home or I'm out; Of course I can't do anything to prevent it - And me being around her all the time is not a viable solution.
After all that, do you really think I don't care as long as it doesn't happen at my house? Or was that your attempt at something witty?
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| snpr1101 wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 04:33 |
Yes, If she wants to fuck 20 year olds, she will find a way, but it sure as hell won't be happening here.
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I never said you didn't care. I said it's your attitude that's alienating her.
By making sure it doesn't happen at your parents home, you'll push her away.
You was mad and reacted badly, you need to apologise to your sister. Perhaps hint at her introducing her boyfriend to your parents. Don't make her feel bad about herself, who do you think she's going to turn to?
Come on dumbass, get smart!
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| Re: Some IRL Drama just went down; your thoughts? [message #433800 is a reply to message #433779] |
Fri, 30 July 2010 02:22 |
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JohnDoe
Messages: 1416
Registered: May 2006
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| snpr1101 wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 02:24 |
I'm 18 and would feel uncomfortable hanging out in a 16 year old (minor = hello legal case) girls room.
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Pretty sure you'd feel uncomfortable in any girls room.
20 and 16 isn't really too weird (18 and 16 describes literally every high school relationship), except if the guy's looking for a soulmate instead of a nut haha. I remember this dumb fat girl in school that used to have a 34 yr old boyfriend who was a coworker of her dad's when she was like 15 lmfao, now that's fucked up.
I don't have a sister, so I don't know how I would react...chances are the guy's a loser and I don't feel sorry for him getting run outta the house by two melvins.
lol
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| Re: Some IRL Drama just went down; your thoughts? [message #433805 is a reply to message #433779] |
Fri, 30 July 2010 02:59 |
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sadukar09
Messages: 2812
Registered: May 2007
Location: Ottawa,Canada
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Sometimes you have to trust your sister's judgement. I know what you are trying to do, but you gotta let your sister be independent once in a while. The guy she brought home might have not known she was 16.
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| Re: Some IRL Drama just went down; your thoughts? [message #433810 is a reply to message #433796] |
Fri, 30 July 2010 03:17 |
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Dover
Messages: 2547
Registered: March 2006
Location: Monterey, California
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| snpr1101 wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 01:49 |
| Dover wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 03:41 |
I'm 20. My sister just turned 15. I trust that she's smart enough to bring the right guys home. If, by chance, she isn't, then me playing sex-police isn't going to do anybody any good. And neither will playing tough guy.
Your issue isn't with the guy. You don't know him, he doesn't know you, and neither one of you gives a fuck about the other. Your issue is with your sister.
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If this is the case, then I can not help her. She would not listen to me for advice. I presume the only thing left is to let my parents deal with it.
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That is the case, and I don't see anyone in need of help. You haven't said anything about this guy other than that he looks 20ish and didn't shake your hand. What do you think your parents do, exactly?
| DarkDemin wrote on Thu, 03 August 2006 19:19 |
Remember kids the internet is serious business.
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| Re: Some IRL Drama just went down; your thoughts? [message #433814 is a reply to message #433811] |
Fri, 30 July 2010 04:17 |
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Dover
Messages: 2547
Registered: March 2006
Location: Monterey, California
Karma: 0
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General (2 Stars) |
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| Goztow wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 03:18 |
I LOL'ed!
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Hmm? What's funny? That I trust my family members not to be morons? I was that young not too long ago, and I remember the stupid things I did (and the people I did them with) with clarity. I turned out okay. As long as she's safe enough to prevent any permanent consequences, what she does is nobody elses business.
| Goztow wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 03:18 |
I think what Snipr did was pretty damn logical. Don't forget his sister was clearly tryting to avoid anyone knowing about it. I agree that it's better she gets experience at a decent place rather than in the bushes but then you first get aprooval from the parents as it's still their house you live in. And you make sure the guy is at least half serious...
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Of course she was trying to avoid anyone knowing about it. It's nobody elses business. I'd be more worried if she said "Don't mind us, we're just furiously humping over here". Where's the logic in what he did? He hasn't stopped his sister from doing anything. All he's done is piss people off. What logic can there possibly be in not even accomplishing your goals? Making sure the guy is serious or the place is appropriate is her call to make, not his. I'm all for being old fashioned, but I think other people deciding when and where you can have sex is crossing the line.
| Goztow wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 03:18 |
So either he ignored it, which seems wrong in my eyes; or he just told his parents, which is even worse in my eyes as it's up to her to take that way; or he did what he did. Sure it's not a good solution but I don't see any other one, really...
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Solution? Where's the problem? Snpr isn't involved at all. He just happened to place himself in a situation that wasn't asking for his input.
| Goztow wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 03:18 |
Get her out to talk in private, then what? Get her to kick him out instead? How's that less alienating?
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If it's really bothering him that much, talk it out. He's overstepping any time he forces an action out of her, though.
| Goztow wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 03:18 |
Have a talk with your sister, explain her what I explained and ask how she would have reacted if she were in your shoes... she might come to thank you  .
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You underestimate my sister. 
| DarkDemin wrote on Thu, 03 August 2006 19:19 |
Remember kids the internet is serious business.
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[Updated on: Fri, 30 July 2010 04:19] Report message to a moderator |
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| Re: Some IRL Drama just went down; your thoughts? [message #433817 is a reply to message #433779] |
Fri, 30 July 2010 04:30 |
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snpr1101
Messages: 425
Registered: June 2007
Location: Australia
Karma: 0
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Commander |
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| Boofst0rm wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 05:04 |
lol, you do know that shes legal
age of consent in aus is 16
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To my knowledge it's 16-18. If you're over 18 you can't have sex with a 16 year old.
| sadukar09 wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 04:59 |
Sometimes you have to trust your sister's judgement. I know what you are trying to do, but you gotta let your sister be independent once in a while. The guy she brought home might have not known she was 16.
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Oh, he knew. They have known each other for some time, yet they aren't best friends.
| Dover wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 05:17 |
That is the case, and I don't see anyone in need of help. You haven't said anything about this guy other than that he looks 20ish and didn't shake your hand. What do you think your parents do, exactly?
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For starters, do you not have any objection what so ever in relation to the age difference? Apart from it being illegal, it's turning out to be the classic "Hey I can get older guys" and "Derp I'm a loser who can't / cbf to get girls my own age". Do you know how easy it is to get younger girls who have litte/no money, can't drive themselves anywhere and can't buy their own alcohol? It's dead easy. It's a relationship that is clearly not one based upon any real values that you could use to even justify it.
Would my parents have a problem with my sister being a slut? I think so. Do I have a problem with this? Yea, I do. I don't want her to go down that sort of path. If she was 18, hell - I wouldn't of done what I did, because I can accept that as an adult she has the legal right to have sex with anyone she wants.
| JohnDoe wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 04:22 |
| snpr1101 wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 02:24 |
I'm 18 and would feel uncomfortable hanging out in a 16 year old (minor = hello legal case) girls room.
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Pretty sure you'd feel uncomfortable in any girls room.
20 and 16 isn't really too weird (18 and 16 describes literally every high school relationship), except if the guy's looking for a soulmate instead of a nut haha. I remember this dumb fat girl in school that used to have a 34 yr old boyfriend who was a coworker of her dad's when she was like 15 lmfao, now that's fucked up.
I don't have a sister, so I don't know how I would react...chances are the guy's a loser and I don't feel sorry for him getting run outta the house by two melvins.
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I didn't think I would have to word it differently to avoid predictable shit; I guess I was wrong. What I was trying to say is that I know how it would make a 16 year old girls' parents feel if they learned I was alone with their daughter in her room without them knowing about it. And I respect that. That's why every girl I've been with has been my age - because they liked me for me; not because of my car, my age or how much money I had.
I'm not saying that my moral standard is the level of expectation for everyone; I'm just pointing out the differences between what is accepted and what is not.
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| Re: Some IRL Drama just went down; your thoughts? [message #433819 is a reply to message #433817] |
Fri, 30 July 2010 04:39 |
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Dover
Messages: 2547
Registered: March 2006
Location: Monterey, California
Karma: 0
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General (2 Stars) |
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| snpr1101 wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 04:30 |
For starters, do you not have any objection what so ever in relation to the age difference? Apart from it being illegal, it's turning out to be the classic "Hey I can get older guys" and "Derp I'm a loser who can't / cbf to get girls my own age". Do you know how easy it is to get younger girls who have litte/no money, can't drive themselves anywhere and can't buy their own alcohol? It's dead easy. It's a relationship that is clearly not one based upon any real values that you could use to even justify it.
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Any objection based soley on the age? No, I don't. If your sister is that kind of person, then I feel sorry for your situation but her mistakes are her own to make. I wouldn't be so quick to write off the entire relationship just because she's 16 and he's 20, and
| snpr1101 wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 04:30 |
Would my parents have a problem with my sister being a slut? I think so. Do I have a problem with this? Yea, I do. I don't want her to go down that sort of path. If she was 18, hell - I wouldn't of done what I did, because I can accept that as an adult she has the legal right to have sex with anyone she wants.
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Your sister is automatically a slut because she's dating an older man? How absurd. Over half of the women I've dated have been older than me. Are you calling me a slut? If not, why the double standard? >:[
She's not magically mature enough to have sex on her 18th birthday. If she was 17 and 11 1/2 months, would you have done it? Is your outrage based legally on morally?
| snpr1101 wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 04:30 |
| JohnDoe wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 04:22 |
| snpr1101 wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 02:24 |
I'm 18 and would feel uncomfortable hanging out in a 16 year old (minor = hello legal case) girls room.
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Pretty sure you'd feel uncomfortable in any girls room.
20 and 16 isn't really too weird (18 and 16 describes literally every high school relationship), except if the guy's looking for a soulmate instead of a nut haha. I remember this dumb fat girl in school that used to have a 34 yr old boyfriend who was a coworker of her dad's when she was like 15 lmfao, now that's fucked up.
I don't have a sister, so I don't know how I would react...chances are the guy's a loser and I don't feel sorry for him getting run outta the house by two melvins.
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I didn't think I would have to word it differently to avoid predictable shit; I guess I was wrong. What I was trying to say is that I know how it would make a 16 year old girls' parents feel if they learned I was alone with their daughter in her room without them knowing about it. And I respect that. That's why every girl I've been with has been my age - because they liked me for me; not because of my car, my age or how much money I had.
I'm not saying that my moral standard is the level of expectation for everyone; I'm just pointing out the differences between what is accepted and what is not.
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I'm pretty sure JohnDoe was just calling you on being a dweeb, as opposed to misunderstanding a vaguely-worded statement. Clarifying wouldn't make you less of a dweeb...
| DarkDemin wrote on Thu, 03 August 2006 19:19 |
Remember kids the internet is serious business.
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[Updated on: Fri, 30 July 2010 04:40] Report message to a moderator |
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| Re: Some IRL Drama just went down; your thoughts? [message #433823 is a reply to message #433819] |
Fri, 30 July 2010 06:23 |
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snpr1101
Messages: 425
Registered: June 2007
Location: Australia
Karma: 0
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Commander |
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| Dover wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 06:39 |
Any objection based soley on the age? No, I don't. If your sister is that kind of person, then I feel sorry for your situation but her mistakes are her own to make. I wouldn't be so quick to write off the entire relationship just because she's 16 and he's 20.
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Sadly, I am discovering that she is that type of person. It's not a proper relationship. They aren't dating.
| Dover wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 06:39 |
Your sister is automatically a slut because she's dating an older man? How absurd. Over half of the women I've dated have been older than me. Are you calling me a slut? If not, why the double standard? >:[
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You big manwhore. No, she's automatically a slut because of the reasons provided as to why she's actually doing this and the amount of guys she has had sex with.
| Dover wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 06:39 |
She's not magically mature enough to have sex on her 18th birthday. If she was 17 and 11 1/2 months, would you have done it? Is your outrage based legally on morally?
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The reality is she's 16. Of course 18 is not some magical number where upon reaching that age you're spontaneously mature enough to have sex. I'm just outraged because it's illegal and they both know it; and he should know better.
| Dover wrote on Fri, 30 July 2010 06:39 |
I'm pretty sure JohnDoe was just calling you on being a dweeb, as opposed to misunderstanding a vaguely-worded statement. Clarifying wouldn't make you less of a dweeb...
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I'm pretty sure JonDoe was just having a dig at me. Do I need to elaborate on what I said; and how he manipulated it? Please don't call me a dweeb m8, I'm very sensitive when it comes to name calling on the internet.
I find myself regretting making this topic. I herd smart peoplez post personal problems on the interwebs.
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