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My Opinions on Clans(Warning: Anti-Clan Rant Ahead) [message #185945]

Mon, 16 January 2006 15:42

Dr. Lithius
Messages: 609
Registered: March 2005

Karma: 0

Colonel

Excuse the disorganization in this topic. Talking about this in full-swing tends to throw my sense of organization askew. That aside, let's get into why I hate Clans! ^^

In my opinion, I think Clans are stupid, obnoxious, pointless "prick-waving dick-fights," to paraphrase George Carlin. Or, if you wanna be less vulgar about it, a great deal of the time the matter turns into something akin to a "My Dad can beat up your Dad!" matter, or in some cases, gang war style. Two clans start going at it for no apparent reason, right in the middle of nowhere(say...a forum), disrupting the peace and tranquility of the place and ruining things for passersby.
In addition, most Clans that I've seen don't become Clans for the sheer fun of it, no sir. They habitually do so to show "superiority" in the field of battle; show that, while they may not have any real lives, they sure can mop up the virtual planes of existence with the blood of their enemies! *tch* Reeeeal useful skill, right? Bragging rights. Whee.
Even worse are these apparent "theme clans". Name themes, like BURGER Clan and {CiA} Clan.(While amusing in theory, what's the effing point?) Elitist clans like XilClan. Weaponry theme Clans -- Sniper's Rifle, Minigun, etc. -- like 90% of the Clans out there. Or the worse... Clans who are full of people solely out to ruin the game for the rest of us by hacking, cheating, and just plain being asshats...such as myg0t.(Yes, I know that's hypocritical considering I find the playbacks hilarious, but looking at it from the player's point of view...)

Clans are nothing but festering cesspools of the worst kinds of useless scum. It is rare, very rare, to find a Clan which contains nice, polite, courtious people who not only play for the sake of playing, but aren't elitist cock-mongers who have no interest in "making friends" and "entertaining themselves". No, the kinds of people you usually meet in Clans are the type of people who do critical damage to their keyboards when they get shot in the head in Counter-Strike: Source and tape the Voice Chat key down so you can hear their excruciated screams of fury and pissiness.
I will admit this. Occasionally... Just occasionally... You'll find some Clan out there who's actually just "a group of friends from the same town," or "a bunch of people randomly gathered from the Internet" who don't make it a priority to screw with people. This doesn't happen often enough to make up for the fact that a huge chunk of all Clans are useless, pointless, and full of social outcasts who would just as soon blow up their school than try and get a real life. And again, sometimes it's not their fault. Sometimes fate just conspires against them and they become the absolute and utter geeks they are. I'm very thankful I, despite my obvious mental deficiencies, did not turn out the way a good chunk of all Clan Mates have.

In summation, I effing hate Clans. I don't care that most of them could destroy me with a thought... I play for fun. However, when I go into a Clan Server and find Clanmates all on one side, not only dominating, but actually taking the time to publicly humiliate their opponents(say...in Tribes Football), well... That, friends, is where I draw the line.
This is why I do what I do. This is why you usually find me nay-saying 99% of the clans out there. This is why I refuse to join any clan.(Not that I've ever been offered, mind you. Remember? "Play for fun, not for keeps"?)

Expecting flames a'plenty,
"Dr. Styringer J. Lithius"

[Updated on: Mon, 16 January 2006 15:43]